Day 725 of the Pandemic

 In five days it will be the two year anniversary of this whole Covid-19 mess starting. I have rode the roller coaster of emotions and worry. I have even now been directly exposed.

Last month on my day off I started to feel sick. A slight temperature and my sinuses were draining causing me to cough. I stayed at home and by Monday I felt better and went back to work. But that wasn't the end. Tuesday my husband Brian stayed home and went and got tested for the Flu and Covid. The next day we find out he tested positive for Covid. I called work that evening because before logging in each day we need to do a health check. One of the questions has to do with spending more than 15 minutes with a person known to test positive. I called and let my supervisor know and had to notify our HR person. I was asked if I was fully vaccinated and said no and was told to take the next 10 days off. Did I have it and give it to Brian or not that I don't know. Most likely I brought it home since his contact with people is much less than my own and there was a person the week before that came to work everyday coughing and then was out the week I went back. I was never tested. Brian and I both stayed at home for the 10 days the only place I went was to the grocery store. We had a vacation weekend planned we didn't take. I had a funeral to attend I didn't go. Not because we didn't want to do these things but for the sake of all the others attending both events.

As of Monday we have been told we no longer have to wear masks if we aren't vaccinated and we will no longer have to do the health check. I know quite a few people that work for other companies have said the same thing. Even the grocery stores have stopped making it mandatory for the employees. As a rule Brian and I do wear masks when we go out and will probably continue to do so for a while. We still don't venture out a lot and most places we try to keep our distance from others. 

On February 15, the day Brian was tested the CDC website shows for Pinellas County a 7 day average of  702 new cases and now almost a month later Pinellas County 7 day average is 732 new cases. Down to 42 deaths and 101 new hospitalizations of confirmed cases and 66% of the residents over the age of 5 are vaccinated. The state of Florida shows 5.8 million cases and almost 72,000 deaths and the US statistics show a total of over 79 million cases and over 963,000 deaths.

As far as I can tell the world is going to go on I know there are people that haven't and will not do anything different as they did before this whole thing started. Others have altered their life so much they will never get back to where they were before even if they wanted to. This is the last entry I will have before the publishing of the Dawn of the Pandemic. 

I am still trying to figure out the moral of this story. Will it be another 100 years before the next pandemic or will it be sooner? Did we learn anything from all of this? I hope that before I finish editing the book I have an answer. 

Stay safe. I guess we can still say that. 

Day 689 of the Pandemic

Here we are just 41 days shy of the two year mark. Someone posted on Facebook the other day we should all get on with our lives it has been two years. Well, I am afraid this is life and for the most part people are getting on with what they can. I personally am still dealing with the death of my father. The thought that he won't return is still a mixed bag of feelings. I have been told that by not seeing him sick or not seeing him after his death is a difficult thing to absorb. I know he isn't living in the wilds of Alaska but some days it would just be easier to believe that he is. I look to the sky and I see the moon and I still think somewhere out there we are still seeing the same moon and stars so he is and always will be with me.

A few weeks ago I heard a new word and now I guess it is the talk. Endemic, a constant presence or usual prevalence of a disease in a population within a certain geographic location. A pandemic such as Covid-19 spreads world wide quickly. Each new variant means a change in the way the vaccine works against the virus so there will need to be booster shots and each variant will continue to be an epidemic disease spreading across the world and not contained to a particular geographic area. 

Each variant named for letters of the Greek alphabet instead of where they were first found it is a nice way of not saying this is the Chinese disease or the India variant. Since where it starts doesn't matter. Each new variant will make its way to where ever you are. We have had many variants of the virus over the last couple years. After the initial Covid-19 outbreak it wasn't until September of 2020 when they discovered the Alpha variant in the United Kingdom then by the end of 2020 we had the Delta variant found first in India spreading especially through the summer of 2021 across the United States. And we are now into the Omnicron variant that was first discovered in South Africa and has now as well spread world wide. Where the Delta variant (most likely what my father had) caused more hospitalizations but didn't spread as quickly as the Omnicron variant which at this time seems to make most infected less sick than the Delta and some have shown to have symptoms like not being able to taste or smell and having trouble breathing but when they have their noses swabbed as normal testing procedure they may test negative. This variant seems to be more in a person's throat than in their sinuses but at this time testing remains the same. The information on the variants I found between the webpages of the World Health Organization and Yale Medicines website. 

As this virus seems to do through out the fall we had a steady decline in cases so of course people feeling pretty safe ventured out for Thanksgiving and in Pinellas County there were no new cases that week. Starting November 30 over 300 new cases and it just went up from there through December. At my work it wasn't til Christmas Eve one of my friends didn't come into work and she had all the symptoms but tested negative but 3 or 4 other people in the same room as me at work tested positive. I sit towards the back of the room and only have one person that sits near me and some days there is no one within a few rows of desks to me. By the end of December the county was showing over 900 new cases and by mid January the average new cases were over 2,000 in Pinellas County. Now the beginning of February and the numbers show a total of 192 thousand cases in Pinellas County with 2,900 deaths. In the U.S. over 5.5 million cases and almost 66,000 deaths. A comparison in the 2017-2018 Flu season the worst in the last 10 years saw over 700,000 hospitalizations and over 50,000 deaths. 

A person who goes looking for statistics and facts on Covid can go crazy looking at numbers and charts. It isn't as though you can go to one source and know it is for sure what you need to know since the information changes quickly and is based off the data they have received to date. That is about as accurate a statement as any I read and also just about as vague. 

At work after the holidays we would have liked to have been sent back home to protect those of us that haven't and were not sick but instead I felt like I was 10 and my neighbors mom just called my mom and said hey Joey has chicken pox has your kids had them yet. Bring them over for a sleep over then they will have all had it. Well doesn't seem to work so well with Covid. I know a few people at work have had it multiple times. Some are vaccinated or so they say. Some were out for 2 weeks and others if they stopped showing symptoms were asked to come back to work sooner. So do you believe the government or the company you work for. Does anyone actually have my best interest in their decisions they make. 

I haven't really spoke about booster shots but before the holidays the power's that be were recommending for those 65 and older to get a booster shot. Now the CDC recommends to anyone over 18 should get the booster shot at least 5 months after the initial vaccination. I have heard if you have the Pfizer vaccine to get the Moderna booster shot to have better coverage. Johnson & Johnson that was the one shot company the CDC now recommends that you get the Pfizer or Moderna booster as well. 

My final thought Pfizer's revenue is up 134% since December of 2020 and net income has increased from $594 million to $8.15 billion by September of 2021 and Moderna net income from -$272 million in December of 2020 to $3.3 billion by September of 2021. Just for comparison sake  Apple's net income in March of 2021 $23.6 billion and ended December of 2021 $34.6 billion. Not nearly the increase as the drug companies which it has been said are making profits of $65,000 per minute as I found in an article on reliefweb.int and another on Yahoo that stated they will make as much from the vaccine revenue in 2021 as the total company revenue for 2020.

All very interesting. And like a said earlier a statistical nightmare to try to keep up with. 

Stay safe out there and Dawn of the Pandemic the book is coming very soon.

Day 577 of the Pandemic

 Time flies so fast. I don't know how it got to be October when it feels like my father just passed away. In reality it has been two and a half months since he did, and a month since we laid him to rest in the Gulf of Mexico. Yet that feels like it was last week and I still expect him to get back from his trip anytime. Reality is just not real anymore. It is no more real than anything else I read on the internet or see on T.V. 

The Covid talk at work drives me crazy. There are numerous people that have had it and they must have earned a PHD in Covid while they were home for the two weeks. They all seem to be experts. At times now I have to walk away. I will not say what I know. You are not safe no one is. I don't believe the vaccine or anything else other than good hygiene and keeping my distance from large groups of people will keep me safe. And then part of me believes after being exposed to so many people that have had it how could I have not built up some immunity? 

I have found a new anxiety trigger in Covid. Like I needed another. But as little as a sneeze and I am going to die. Just like my dad. I know this seems extreme but if you don't know anxiety, it is a quick and slippery slope that gets me to a bad place. And it can take hours to get back to normalcy. 

My father wouldn't want me to be scared. At the beginning of Covid he didn't let anyone in his house. We would have to leave things on the porch. He didn't want to even talk across the yard. But after a few months of isolation he decided that is no way to live either. If you only have a short time it should be enjoyed. Thank God he did. He enjoyed his time he had left. He fished and gardened. He read books and continued to learn things. 

It was his birthday when we laid him to rest. All his children, grandchildren and many friends came out. Plans changed at the last minute due to the weather but an artificial reef made of his ashes was placed in the Gulf. Afterwards we did what dad would want to do if he was 10 miles out in the Gulf. We went fishing. We caught fish, we ate and played music and talked about previous fishing trips with dad. He would have loved it. His great granddaughter caught her first fish out on the boat and all his grandchildren caught fish. I hope it becomes a regular family event. Afterwards we all went to eat and had the fish cooked up and told more stories of days gone by. 

For my Covid Update. Booster shots are now a thing. The drug companies are all saying another shot for those more susceptible or in close contact with those that have been exposed should get another shot. Even Johnson & Johnson the whole one and done, well not so much. The big thing since school started is that the Florida Governor doesn't want to mandate mask wearing but some school districts do. This has caused a raucous over funding of the schools. The President would like companies with more than 100 employees to mandate vaccination. See how different peoples opinions are, and those people are mandating what the rest of us do. 

Here in Pinellas County we are getting back to where people feel safe. Cases are dropping we are down to 153 cases and only 1,053 new cases last week. Total of 133 thousand cases and just over 2,500 deaths.  

I just don't know what to do with all this information. It comes at you from every direction and from every source imaginable. As I keep telling people that are convinced of one or the other I am not sure and know what I have been doing for the last year and a half has worked so far. I don't want to prove I have been vaccinated weather I have been or not. So here I stand riding the rail of the Covid fence just trying to get through this difficult time. Just like everyone else.

Day 521 of the Pandemic

 I ended the last post believing dad would get better and that he would come home. Well, life isn't always what you believe.  Dad had complications and without getting into details I don't want to share he did end up on the ventilator and we were still holding on to hope but it wasn't meant to be. On August 3, 2021 my father passed away not from Covid but complications due to having Covid. I have been working on the Dawn of the Pandemic since last year. I thought the story would end when I went back to work and things went back to normal. I don't want to ever use the words new normal to define how things are to my family today. 

I am so thankful dad got his trip of a lifetime to Alaska. I am very sad that I will never get to hear him tell the stories. I will not get to learn from him how far they drove to get to the pipeline where his picture was taken. I will not be able to hear him tell how cold it was out on the water in Homer while they fished. How amazing it was to experience being inside the Artic Circle. Dad would have told the whole thing like an adventure. Talk about some seedy bar that he will make you want to hang out in. But that is just not to be.

On Saturday August 21 we had a funeral service for my dad (William H. Basore) better known as "Bill". The church was full of family and friends. The church would not allow a reception to follow due to Covid spikes. They also announced the day before his service that they would stop having church services in person after dad's service. We are thankful that we got what we did for him. 

It is a shame that people don't always tell those that mean so much how important they are. Dad was loved by his family and by people that worked with him at AAmco and on the fishing boats he has worked on in retirement. 

His ashes will be placed to rest on his birthday in the Gulf of Mexico. There will always be a spot in the Gulf to go fishing with dad.

Covid-19 stats of July 2021 show that in Pinellas County the numbers were starting to increase. The same as they did last year. Hospitals have waits that are hours longer than normal. Some are again at capacity. I know dad waited a good portion of a day in the emergency room in Anchorage to get a bed in the hospital. He was there from July 27th - August 3rd. He will be missed more than he could have ever known. RIP Dad!

Day 497 of the Pandemic

 On Day 488 I had to return to work. Pack your computer in your car but don't bring it in. There is a new one set up at your station. You just need to walk around and find where your new desk is. They didn't have everyone come back on the same day. There were 3 or 4 of us that came back that day. One was one of my friends that I talked to in the morning before work. The other had been back to work for a while at the office. Never really understood the reason for the people to be kept at work or the ones sent home. 

Day one back to work was like I never left from a job I had never been to before. Some things were just as they had always been and others were different. Mask wearing, health checks are part of the new process. The job still the same and after day 3 we find out that one of the girls that had come back has Covid. Well wonderful. Why are we back. What is the reason. Things seem to be getting worse in the world of Covid and yet here we are back sitting about 6 feet apart but in a room that has about 30 desks only about half are back after the second week. Well day 7 we learned of the second case in a room that only has about 15 people in it. A person that sits half way closer than the first. Why are we back. While home we would randomly get an email saying that someone that works in the building had tested positive and it said what day they were last at work. We have yet to be told the first person went home sick was tested positive for Covid now we have two and no word. No special cleaning nothing that made me feel like my health was the most important thing. 

After work last Thursday I got a call I didn't expect my father and his wife have been traveling in Alaska since June 22 and he and his wife have Covid. They have postponed their flight home and are quarantined in the hotel. Dad has a horrible cough but whenever he gets sick he gets a horrible cough. Worse since his bypass surgery about 5 or 6 years ago. This is a concern especially since he is so far from home and not the best patient. Friday we got a call that he was taken to the hospital and his oxygen level was very low and so they kept him. His wife couldn't stay with him, she went back to the hotel. A daily call from her is our update. Saturday we got the call that he was on a ventilator and in intensive care. I know people say it can happen to anyone at anytime. There is a chance for a loss. But my father is not the one to lose not while in Alaska not without a fight. Not my dad. As the information was shared between my brother and sisters. The tears were real and burned the memories of the past and thoughts of the future. But I told my sisters, If this is the case with dad he isn't worrying he is thinking about staying in Denali, fishing for flounder and seeing the pipeline. A trip he planned for two years. This couldn't be how this story ends.

Two of us that same evening decided we needed to figure out what hospital he was at and get the news from the source. One of my sisters made the call and we found out that we were misinformed about his dire situation and not that he was out of the woods but he had not been on a ventilator but he has been on oxygen the whole time and that he was sitting up and eating and drinking. He did also have pneumonia. He is hungry and as the nurse said he is struggling with the cannula in his nose. My sister said so he is fighting that. That sounds like dad. Which somehow dad fighting about anything made us feel better and made us smile. We are Basore's and for better or worse we have a double dose of stubborn in our DNA.  

One sister now in Alaska helping our dad's wife get situated knowing that dad may be another week in the hospital before he will be released but the nurses didn't realize that he wasn't a Alaskan that he was a Floridian and home wasn't around the block but a 10 hour flight away. The story will continue. 

As for the current state of affairs in Pinellas County back in June we were at a low down to less than 50 new cases per day, then this new variant. Now we are back up to over 1,300 new cases a day and that is where we were in January while people were still working from home. So the prospects for going to work is troubling. 

Along with going back to work I have stopped my daily walking in the morning before work but that may have to change as well. I might have to just start getting up earlier.

Stay safe.

Day 452 of the Pandemic

 It has been 5 months since the last time I wrote here about the Pandemic. I have been writing daily as I walk  each morning before work about the sunrise or the phase of the moon and placement of the stars and the animals and very few people I come across. I have not avoided the Covid 15 which is the average weight that most people have gained during this time of lockdown. Mine is more like Covid 23. Which is why the walking each morning is so important. I have been trying to add at least a 15 minute walk in the evening. I can feel the weight and more than that I hate going to the doctor and getting on the scale to hear the number out loud. 

But my weight was not what I sat down to write about today. It is that early morning time which my brain seems to fire on all cylinders and since yesterday I have been thinking about the last month and on May 19 Governor DeSantis of Florida suspended all remaining health restrictions for the state of Florida. At that time Florida had the third most cases of Covid-19 at 2.2 million and fourth highest death toll at 35,000.  The CDC shows as of today a total of  over 33 million cases in the US and that the cases per day and death tolls are dropping. 64% of Americans have at least one dose of the vaccine. 

My confusion lies in the restrictions and regulations. When everyone was following the CDC guidelines it was easy because you knew you needed a mask to go inside just about anywhere. Now the state says if you are vaccinated you don't need to where a mask that it to show they have confidence in the vaccine but any privately owned business can still have their own mask restrictions. They can still require employees to wear a mask and/or require their customers to vaccinated or not. The Governor of Florida has said there will be no vaccine passport in Florida. But again your place of employment can ask if you have been vaccinated and make requirements separate based on weather you are or not. So everyone basically has to carry a mask because you don't know until you walk up to the door of a business if they are going to require you to wear one or not. For girls not so bad I have about 4 in my purse at anytime but for guys that is different. My brother last night was out and I said do you no longer need a mask as we were leaving and he said no but at 1:30am he was told by the Uber driver that came to pick him up that he did. Which in turn meant that I received a phone call for a ride home. My sister answered first so she took him. I don't care that my brother called I don't care if I have to pick him up. It is the fact that the rules are so vague and hit or miss that you don't know what is right or wrong.

There are still restrictions in some states so you should check before travelling. Brian and I are heading to a wedding in a few weeks in Pennsylvania so we will keep an eye on there.

The vaccines can't be advertised on TV because they aren't fully approved by the FDA. So instead of the adds we see on TV daily for all sorts of other medicines there are advertisements in general asking us to all do our part but no Covid vaccine companies can advertise directly because they are only approved for Emergency Use Authorization since December. It normally takes about a year for a drug to become fully FDA approved. So here is the double edge sword for the FDA do they approve a vaccine fully that they only have 6 months of statistical data on or do they wait? If they wait that isn't showing a profound confidence and those that are skeptical to begin with may hesitate more in getting their vaccination. Or does the FDA fully approve a vaccine that they aren't 100% confident with but knowing the data they have shows it to be safe to date. 

Notice I have not mentioned weather I have been vaccinated. I don't feel it is anyone's business. If my work asks I will tell the truth but none of your business would be my choice. My work has not yet figured out how to get everyone back to the office due to some issues with one of the buildings at work. So they are trying to make room in one building for everyone. I have only been by the office twice in over a year. As I have said many times I only miss some of the people. I don't miss the noise but I miss the camaraderie. Sometimes it is nice to have others to complain about the day with but I have adjusted to working from home and I enjoy the benefits of not having to wear shoes and being able to wash the dishes or do a load of laundry on break. But when necessary I will do what I have to do.   Which is I guess the moral of the story. We have to continue to do what we need to do. But as I will tell anyone it is also your right to choose not to go somewhere based on their restrictions.  I will continue to update when relevant. I am working on compiling all of the things I have written since the beginning and it will be called the Dawn of the Pandemic. Hopefully completed by later this year.

Day 304 of the Pandemic

Now over nine months into the Covid-19 Pandemic and we are all wondering will this ever end. Back in March it was once the temperature warms up things will get better. The spread of the virus will slow. Instead it seems to increased. Is it due to more people getting out and ignoring the social distancing requests. In August Florida had over 526,000 cases and Pinellas County was at almost 18,000. Daily positive cases peaked at 869 in the county just after Christmas. Yet the county deaths by week peaked in July with 89. Today, January 15, 2021 in Pinellas County had 51,000 cases with 1,500 deaths. The state of Florida has had 1.5 million cases and 23,000 deaths. In comparison in 2019 the state of Florida had 2,703 deaths from the flu. 

Brian and I are still doing our same thing. Mostly staying home. We do go out and see some family and we may go out to eat once a week. Other than going to the Historical Society I am home. It is boring and at first I would find small projects or even work a puzzle. Now the puzzle just sits on the dining room table and it is read or watch TV.  I am still working from home with no mention of going back. I have adjusted more. I walk every morning before work about a half a mile. This time of year it is still dark at 6:20 so I have a street that is well lit near the house that I walk and I feel safe. I have started carrying my phone because I have had a few times where I was startled by someone's approach. For the most part most days are quiet and I see no one. Brian works retail and heads out everyday mask in hand. He wears his mask all day and comes home hopefully only carrying the smells of the dogs that visit his store and not a virus. Neither of us have been sick. We of course know people that have but none we have been in recent contact with.

Testing is a funny thing. Some people want to know they have it and others don't. I see both sides. Why know? Knowing certainly will not make you get better and taking care of yourself is really all you can do either way and limit your contact with others. It is the people that are sick weather or not tested and still continue to go out and live as though they are well. They just perpetuate the spread. 

As for restrictions I could only find in the US California and Ohio have nightly curfews but in Europe that is different some countries like Norway and Sweden have no curfew or lockdown but in England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and Wales all have restrictions and can only leave the house for essentials like grocery's and medical visits. Poland has closed shopping malls and hotels but you can still get your hair cut but restaurants can only do take out. And some countries like Austria are on their 3rd lockdown. Just for comparison Austria has a population of 8.8 million people with a total case rate of 389,000 to date and 6,300 deaths. Where Florida's population is 21 million and 23,000 deaths. I am sure statistical data people are busy bees with all the data and percentages of these people have got it and these have died. They don't really share recovery statistics. I am not really sure why.

Now we have just started vaccinating people for the virus. There are again two sides to the coin. Should I be vaccinated with this vaccine that hasn't had proper testing. Down the road is it going to cause other troubles. Do I not get the vaccine like the Flu vaccine I never have gotten? Just leaves me with more questions.

So amongst all this Pandemic talk the country had an election. Joe Biden the President elect and Donald Trump until the riot action at the Capitol building in Washington DC was still insisting there was cheating and he won. He has now conceded. I have so many thoughts on all of this but will leave them for another time. People are so polarized it makes me at times put down my phone and stop looking at social media and I hardly ever watch TV news before all of this it is less now.

Like I said earlier I walk every morning. When I get home I write for a few minutes about what I see on my walk. Some mornings in the summer I would describe the sunrise or now I describe the temperature and the stars that are visible and the position and phases of the moon. I am just doing what I can to keep active in this time when the rules want everyone to sit still and wait this thing out. Just not sure that will help us in the end either.

Day 129 Pandemic 2020

Now more than three months into working from home due to Covid-19 I look at things different than I did at the beginning. I miss the people I work with. I chat with them using instant messenger but haven't seen but two people from work in four months. I don't miss everything. I don't miss wearing work clothes to work. I enjoy wearing shorts and being barefoot. Since May I walk everyday before work then come home and post on Facebook about my walk, the sunrise and what I see and hear along the way. I don't ask when we will be going back to work at the office. Not sure I want to. The company sends an email to everyone if someone from the office tests positive but I haven't been there in so long I don't have to worry. I do worry about the people that are still working at the office. When you see someone has called out it is concerning. 

When I wrote in May I sat in a room with people from the Historical Society I belong to and no one in that room knew anyone directly that had the virus. Today that is different. Not only does one of the people from the Historical Society spouse have it and has been hospitalized and returned home. I now know three people in the same family that have it and one friend has had a relative that died. One of the people I know has recovered except can't smell or taste and the another only recently tested positive and has a cough. As you can see there are different severity of this disease. There are different symptoms and much different recovery times. Yes this is now much closer than at the beginning where I couldn't name a name or even a person that knew a person. So as time changes my situation has changed my actions. 

Back at the end of June it became mandatory if you are in a public place you need to wear a mask or some sort of face covering. Still this doesn't seem to be full proof because one person gets the virus and brings it home. Then you get a house of people with the virus but if they don't know they have it now they are sharing it. I now have multiple masks and wear one when I am inside a public place. I am still lax around family which probably isn't the smartest thing. If you go to a restaurant you have to wear the mask until you are seated at a table then you can remove it. When you are ready to get up from the table you must put your mask back on to leave the table. A few months ago I wouldn't have done this but I wouldn't eat inside either. It is now too hot to always choose to eat outside if we want to go out and yes we still want to venture out I am going to wear a mask when in close proximity to others.

Now that we are almost to August the question of when kids should go back to school and how should they attend school is a hot button. My feel is if the people making this decision aren't meeting in person then how can they expect to send teachers and students back to the classroom together. Kids will be kids and yes after a period of time some are going to learn to understand you can't take a drink out of Sally's juice box and you can't share a piece of chewing gum with your boyfriend but that is going to take time. Probably more than the two extra weeks that they are talking about delaying the start of school. Counties have given parents choices on how they want their kids to attend school. Do they want them back in a classroom or to learn at home. Some kids are not going to do as well at home and others are going to be fearful for going back to school. I don't know which way I would lean. I feel that the interaction with other kids is very important but how do you decide.  

The State of Florida now has over 400,000 cases compared to at the beginning of May it was only 40,000 and Pinellas County over 14,600 and in May was 828. Here is the thing with the statistics other than the fact that we have found out over the last month that some testing facilities are only reporting their positive cases and some people that have gone to be tested and left before the test was completed but had filled out the paperwork were reported as positive cases. All of this information not only skews the statistics but it also makes a person wonder. If these are the things that we know what do we still not know? And as I think about the numbers over 1,200 people have been hospitalized for Covid-19 but how many were only there for a day or two and got better? Since in Pinellas County if only 367 people have died from it does it mean the other 14,300 have gotten better? How long is the recovery time for those that do get better? So, I just end up with more questions the more I look into the facts. 

I don't know where all this is leading. I suppose in a few more weeks I will be writing again about more craziness. I wonder if during the Spanish Flu the people of that time did they know what it was and how to not get it or was it just all of a sudden people started getting really sick and dying? Just more questions. Be safe out there. The world is continuously changing and not much for the better.

Day 55 Pandemic 2020

Now that we are well into the second month of dealing with the Pandemic of 2020. I am not sure if I am more or less afraid of contracting the virus. Part of me would like to believe I am one of the many asymptomatic people that have already had it and by being home all the time I have not exposed others and will easily be able to move back on into whatever the new normal life becomes. The other part of me goes out to the grocery store once a week and worries that when I come home that I could have gotten it. Maybe not from personal contact but from a box a cereal I picked up. The more I read and watch on the internet the less you know what to believe. The virus only lasts a few hours on that box of cereal or does it last a few days. One so called expert said that you should leave the mail or your groceries outside as long as you can before bringing them into your house. That isn't really a Florida thing there would be all kinds of critters in your groceries. I am sure that people that live in the wilderness couldn't do that as well. That bear might eat the ice cream or your stimulus check.

The Florida Department of Health has a dashboard of information to make it easy to see and since the last post in regards to the Pandemic my assessment was correct we seemed to have hit our peak of new cases on April 3. As of today 35 days later May 8 we now have a total 828 confirmed cases in Pinellas County, nearly 40,000 for the state of Florida. I have tried but unable to find comparable views of the Flu. My personal opinion which means nothing. I think if you are susceptible to one you are to the other. If you are likely to be hospitalized for one you would the other as well and in turn if you do the simple things like washing your hands and keeping your distance from people that are sick you would be less likely to get either. But what do I know. I don't have a medical degree and I have no background in diagnosing diseases and outbreaks. See what I just did. I gave my opinion and then said I have no idea what I am talking about. If the people that put stuff out on the internet would use the same disclaimers the world would be a better place. I feel the political talking heads have given us their opinion but they aren't medical doctors most I wouldn't consult for anything let alone life or death. Again that is my opinion and I am not a political science major and watch as little of that as I can.

As of this week the beaches are open again. Still with social distancing. I really hope whoever said it first got it copy written. The state of Florida officially decided there will be no more school for the rest of the year. Kids are a mixed bag on this as I can imagine our house would have been when we were kids. What am I going to do with I have so much time to do whatever I want. Time can be a blessing or waste. I am really trying to make more of a blessing out of my time at home. Trying to write and be productive.Not waste the day watching tv. I heard today that phase 2 is to start next week which will include opening barber shops and salons. My brother is hopeful for a social life again and would love to go out and stand next to someone at the bar.

Just as a final thought I shared with some of the people I volunteer with this week while sitting around a room all about 6 feet from the next. I don't personally know anyone that has had this terrible disease and neither did any of them. I wonder what does that mean. The people we know are lucky or have been doing what we are supposed to or are there more people that have had it that didn't know they had it. As for wearing a mask my husband has to for his job. Me personally I have not. I have 2 that people have given me. but haven't found myself in a position where I thought I needed to. Some say you aren't wearing it for yourself that you are wearing it to protect others. I am not sure about that logic either. If a business required that I do I would make a decision at that time. Because I have a choice to shop in that business and wear the mask as they request or not. Well for now I will keep working from home until I am told to come back to the office and will keep washing my hands when I come home from everywhere and keep my hands away from my face. Still the grocery store is my big outing each week. A trip to the museum by myself to work on one project or another alone. Looking forward to social interaction myself.

Day 18 Pandemic 2020

It is always hard for me to start and sometimes that is because I know where I end up or the point I want to make. Today day 18 of my personal dealing with the pandemic of 2020 or whatever they end up calling it. I have no idea where we are going. I am doing my part. I have been out in public about once a week to go to the grocery store.

I have to start back at the end of January was when I first remember hearing a story on the radio about this Corona virus and that young people for some reason believed that this virus originating in China was caused by or could be prevented by drinking Corona beer. This seemed stupid to me as I learned the virus is spread like the flu. It is a respiratory disease that is passed from person to person. The logical person that I am was like we can avoid this by staying healthy and washing your hands just like avoiding getting the flu. I am and was at that time quite confident that I can avoid this.

March 11 was the first day there were two confirmed cases of Corona virus in Pinellas County.

I say day 18 since March 17th was day one of my personal reality check. My work which didn't allow employees to work from home, wanted me to test working from home. Besides the "come see me" message I received from my manager to see the director of our department standing in his office, all I kept thinking is I didn't do anything wrong. It is natural for me to believe I must be in trouble. I try to fly under the radar at work. That day I was asked to do something no one had done before. I felt empowered and scared at the same time. If I mess this up I mess it up for a lot of people. So I was given an hour to get my computer home and hooked up and online and back to work which really was unrealistic but I did it. My manager was waiting to see me connected and asked, how it went and I said, I did it. I worked the rest of the afternoon and sent an email the next morning with the challenges that I had. I had never worked from home before and with no training manual I was getting through my personal challenges.

By the end of the week I had a routine down. The next Monday March 23, day 7, I sent a message to my manager and he said the company wants you to come back to work in the office. Now the situation in the world hasn't gotten better. I truly felt like I must have failed. Maybe I didn't work hard enough even though the day I was on the phone I took 90 calls which is really a pretty good day. So I packed up my computer and monitors and went back to work. The other employees questioned why I was back and did it not work? I just kept saying it did work. By this time we were to social distancing at work. They spread out people across two buildings using every empty office and conference room. A strange new normal had begun. I still had my morning social with my friends that arrive early, we never sat closer than 6 feet apart before so now was no different.

We learned this week that we are considered essential employees. The term is to define employees that still need to work versus those businesses that are not essential should close and their employees should stay at home. The jokes began. My essential pay is no different than my non-essential pay. Essential employees drive better than non-essential employees.

March 30, 129 confirmed cases of Corona virus in Pinellas County

Another week passes and now on day 15 March 31, and while at work I hear a voice I don't know trying to get everyone's attention. This voice is from a person I don't know but find out that it is the Vice President over our department telling us that they are going to send half of the department home to work. Once again I pack up my computer that afternoon and take it home and set it up and the next day start working from home again. I do miss the people I have my morning social with. We now text each other in the morning before work. We are all usually at work 30 minutes early so we have a good talk before it is time to work. Gossip is a little harder to come by but don't worry it is still out there.

April 1, the biggest jump in confirmed cases in Pinellas County to date. 61 confirmed cases almost doubled the day before. Brings the total confirmed to 213. As of today when I am typing this April 4th total 300 cases in Pinellas County with 7 deaths.

The world seems to be sliding down hill. Some aren't taking this social distance stuff serious and maybe I don't take it serious enough. I refuse to wear a mask over my mouth and leave my nose exposed as the people I see at the grocery and I don't wear gloves to touch everything and then take the mask they aren't wearing properly off before removing the gloves. I wash my hands, I try not to touch my face and I try not to have close contact with anyone. But Thursday just before going to the grocery store I learn that 2 employees have been confirmed to have the virus that work at the two stores closest to my house. The part of me that likes to worry has been nervously anticipating the thought that at some point this thing is going to get close. But after reading another article I learn that the employee at the store we normally shop at hasn't been at work for 10 days and that the store has been sanitized multiple times since then.

Like I said at the beginning we don't know where this is going to end. My father being in his 70s has been taking this serious from the beginning and has not let anyone come over. We have all called to check that he doesn't need anything. My sister dropped off eggs to him. Leaving them on his porch to get once she got back towards the car. My one sister that works in a drug store is still working normally, my sister that is a dental assistant hasn't worked for a couple weeks, my sister that works at an elementary school hasn't worked in the traditional sense since their Spring Break a couple weeks ago. She gets online and is available to help students as needed. My brother that works for the City was told last week that he had the next two weeks off except two days a week he comes in to pick up trash from parks. My nieces and nephew that are in school are adapting to online school.

Brian and I are home together nearly 24 hours a day. It is a good thing we love each other and more importantly like each other and even know when to walk away from each other. I can't watch tv like he can so I spend a few hours writing or working outside.

These strange times have brought strange commercials about contact less pizza delivery and restaurants doing family style meals for pick up.

Since these are historic times weather or not everyone living through them realizes. Some day 72 years from now (because that is when this year's census data will be available to the public) Genealogists will be looking at data from the 2020 census which hopefully you logged in and participated in. Will note that it happened during the outbreak or the pandemic or whatever they decide to call it by then. They will know who you were quarantined at home with and they will compare data on some families and learn that some people were alive for the census but died soon after and wonder if the virus is what killed them. They will then look for a death certificate to confirm.

Stay safe.

One Call Resolution

This all started a few days ago at work. I don't always deal with customers but the ones I do, are usually not happy. The thing is over the years I have learned to care for a customer like a friend. I mean old habits die hard. These customers I talk to are transferred to me by other agents that couldn't reach a compromise with the customer for them to move on. One of the things they do is warn me about how bad or good the customer has been on the phone, which doesn't help me. It makes my heart sink into my stomach before I even get the customer on the phone. Now sometimes I get a customer that once I listen I can usually get them to schedule an appointment we can agree on a resolution or steps we are going to take to get to the resolution. Sometime between right now and tomorrow night. It just isn't realistic to believe that there are people sitting at the end of your street waiting for you to call.

So the incident that brought on this post was a customer that has had service issues and I acknowledged that. We had been out before but the first word out of his mouth was not the greeting any woman or female dog would want. It was not a conversation about resolutions or anything else that might have been constructive. I know this man SCREAMED at me for quite a while and I put him on hold which meets two points, one I can think and two I was trying to get him calm down so I can help fix the trouble. When I returned he continued to SCREAM at me again, for quite a while at one point told me I didn't care and I said, "If I didn't I would have already hung up." I did get him an appointment and it was for that afternoon. Even after that it wasn't enough and he SCREAMED more.

I did what I needed to do but the only thing that kept me listening to this man's abusive tirade was that I didn't want him to call back and treat someone else like that. I feared that it might happen anyway with the promises he made during the periods that he wasn't SCREAMING.

I have worked with customers of one sort or another my entire working life, everyone does. Not are they always customers as we are when we shop in Publix but sometimes customers as in another employee that works for the same company that you help resolve an issue to help them complete the job. At Eckerd I would fix someone's in-house email password so they could do their job but they were my customer or assisted with how to use the email service back when that was new. I have always thought that if a customer asks for help I should take them to the product they are looking for or help them as much as I can without doing their job for them.

The point of all this is expectations of customers who believe they are always right. Well like a child having a tantrum kicking and screaming on the floor in the front of the store, that is not going to get you a toy or a piece of candy and it shouldn't. Rewarding poor behavior will not get us anywhere. Acknowledging a problem, and a compromising resolution these are the things that are realistic. I know in my time doing customer service over the phone in other jobs, where I was truly trying to help them fix their problem. One call resolution was what we called it. That was you called in to get help and the person that answered the phone fixed the problem or scheduled an appointment. You the customer off the phone in 15 minutes or so and know that if the issue isn't fixed it will be whenever that tech gets out to fix whatever the problem is.

So why a few weeks ago did Brian call the phone company because the pole in front of our house had been switched out and there was a line hanging down draping across the driveway. It wasn't ours it was to our neighbor who doesn't live in the house year round, he was just trying to help and get the line fixed or cut down. He was on the phone more than an hour and was transferred 11 times and when he hung up they said it would be two weeks before someone could come out. Now how does a company think that that is effective customer service.  I would have given up long before that and waited until I saw a utility truck on the street and gotten them to cut it or fix it. Ironically, that afternoon the power company was back out to remove the old pole and took care of the line. Not his line but the other company's. Not because it was his job but it was the right thing to do.

As an employee that has no bearing on what happens before or after I talk to techs or customers I do the best I can to assist them or point them in the direction of the best person or department to fix their issue.
FYI. There is no better satisfaction than a tech telling me how many other people and how many departments they have spoken to and a few well placed clicks of my keyboard and I have resolve their problem and that of the customer.

If not results Hope.

The Beatles sung "All we need is love" but in truth after any tragedy I think the thing people need most is Hope.  Another shooting another time I can not watch tv or listen to the news and again the sadness returns. I watched CBS Sunday Morning today as I do every week. Knowing at some point I may have to pause or fast forward through names and numbers I can't hear. I know to those that lost someone hearing their name makes you think they will be remembered but I can tell you 5 years afterwards that sometimes that is the hardest thing. Not that you don't love and remember those that you lost but just like losing my mom sometimes it is easier not to think about the end and just remember the good times we had.

Well seeing the young man from the high school speak his mind about change and about expecting something this time from people in positions of power who have not budged before on gun laws made me think. The thing this kid wants is hope. Now I know how this thing played out in the past and every tragedy the survivors think this is the time that Congress is going to listen. This time there will be change. Well the one thing the young man said today that got me was that if they elected officials don't make a change that we will have to. Now in my mind that is saying if you won't change the laws fine expect the end of your term to be the end of your political career. Because honestly people don't change and if you want change then you want new people. And the only way that happens if more than 5 percent of the voting population get out and vote for a change.

I always find it interesting how time changes your perspective on an event. But some situations shouldn't have to happen. In 2011 I volunteered at my nephew's school a few times a week while I was unemployed. I went through a back ground check and a stood outside for fire drills and sat on the floor under the window during a lock down with the blinds closed. These things were all before our family's tragedy. Before I believed it could happen to someone I love. As a volunteer sometimes the teacher would let me know the drill was coming just so I was prepared and knew what to do to assist.

As for Hope. After Brian and I came home we went to a group counseling for people who had lost relatives. I only went once. I couldn't do it again because what I wanted was to see progress. To see that it gets better. I wanted to see time does heal all wounds. Even big gaping ones that you at that moment can't imagine healing.  I will not share the things I heard that night but I didn't see hope. It could be that group had been together a long time and they commiserated with each other and their pain but Brian and I were not the only people there that night for the first time and some of these people had been dealing with their loss for years and I felt were no further along in the grieving process than we were. I found other people to talk to and I found that those people didn't have to live through the same things that I did to listen. Same goes for all the rest of the people and their own personal struggles. Sometimes someone on the outside looking in can gleam a bit of hope for you.

So before I go to work today again I pray. A prayer I have prayed to many times before but because I have hope will probably pray again. Dear Father please watch over the people suffering losses this big because any loss is a large loss to You. Hold them in Your hands and let them know that their is hope. There is a light and that light is You. Amen.

How did this happen?

Someone commented on a recent post I wrote on how much thought goes into what I write. Well really everything I do. When I sat down this morning, the 9th of November 2016 I intentionally did not turn on the TV or go to any of the news media's webpages to find out who the next President of the United States will be. I know it is one of two people neither of which I voted for. I thought about that very seriously. Here is what I decided:

The reason I did not vote for either of the main candidates was that I felt that neither of them were the best choice. No amount of commercials or phone calls to my house could make me choose. I would get the question, "if the election was today who would you choose." and my answer every time was I don't know.

I had considered the lesser of two evil approach which maybe that would have been better but I don't know who won so I don't know the answer to that. I could have helped one or the other out since I know as of last night Florida was a state that they were very close in the polls and returns. But that should not be the approach we take in electing our President. I also considered the fact that I always thought a woman would be a good President but I don't know that the woman running was the candidate I wanted to choose.

In my life I have voted in almost all the elections since I turned 18 and it got to the point where the percentage of people voting was so small that there were times that I thought why doesn't everyone take this seriously. Well... Now will the rest of this country take elections seriously. You have a right to vote being a citizen of this country but you also have an obligation to help select the next "Leader of the Free World". I don't want to be embarrassed by things that our President says and does. One of the candidates has already spent time in the White House and had embarrassing moments there already. Did we really want more of that? Or do we want a business person who's ethics were lost before Millennials were even born. One way or another one of them will be sworn into office in January.

People often say life was better when I was a kid. I had freedom to go outside and play til the street lights came on and my parents didn't worry that I had been abducted. Even people who have lived through times of war in this country saw the good in the times that people helped each other out. Women went to work to support the war effort. Everyone was doing their part. Victory gardens and tie a yellow ribbon round the old oak tree. Times were hard but life was simple.

I know we can't go back but kids today don't know any better. If I never again see an ad on TV talking bad about another candidate I will be happy. How did we get to this point? I tried this past week to look up information on a candidate for Sheriff here where I live and his entire webpage was dedicated to the wrong doings of the other candidate. I couldn't find any information on his webpage about him. Instead of spending money on talking bad about someone else please tell me the good that you can do or have already done.

So here is my idea for running for office. If every time someone offered money for your election campaign you said donate that money to a local charity instead of all the millions of dollars spent on negative ad campaigns we could have provided charities all across this country with money that maybe they could do some good with, instead of padding the TV and Print Ad companies pockets.
I think if $100,000 is donated in the name of your campaign word will get out that you are doing some good in the world and not bad talking the other candidates.

I know in this day and age that what ever bad you have done in your life is probably already on the internet and that is probably the reason people that could be excellent candidates for office decide not to run because maybe they have dirty laundry and don't want it strewn across their front yard for everyone to see. But I guess we have 4 more years to think about all of this and see if we can get collective heads off of the internet and back to real life and realize that this isn't reality TV this is for real and one of those two people will now become our next President.

Our children or grandchildren will study this election and ask how did it happen? And hopefully we will be able to show the good that comes from the error in our ways. God Bless America.

Another Tragedy in the World

So it is 5:30 in the morning and I cannot sleep. I can't turn off my brain and all I keep thinking is that I am avoiding the news and the stories and the drama on tv but my brain still knows it is going on.

I know the suffering the choices that people are making. I know that for some this is all more than they can take in and that somehow going out for a night on the town should never have turned to this tragedy. But it has. I always read a previous post before I start writing. Today I looked back to find what I had written after the Sandy Hook shooting. I first had a hard time finding the post. I didn't realize it was back in 2012, the same year as our own tragedy. After reading what I had written it came back. The feelings then were still fresh, the wounds still open and the anger was real. Part of me thought just re-post what you wrote back then. It is still true, my feelings have not changed and guess what neither has gun laws or the amount of suffering in the world. I do stop and check myself so I just looked up gun law changes in wake of Sandy Hook shooting as far as I could find nothing changed on a national level and only 3 states made changes to existing gun laws: Connecticut, New York and Maryland. So thank you to 3 out of 50 states for saying that a clip holding more than 10 rounds isn't necessary. I know some will think I am cruel but if Congress can't change laws after a shooting in an elementary school what makes anyone believe they will make a change after a shooting in a bar.

One thing that most don't realize when I write these thoughts I am so careful in what I say and have spent an hour writing and only written 2 paragraphs where normally my fingers are tired at this point from all the typing. I have erased more than I will probably share today. I think of the suffering and the sadness. I know that everyone deals with something like this in their own way. Some have to talk about it and get it out and others keep everything inside. I don't begrudge those that must talk about it just please don't talk to me about the details. If you want to talk about healing or getting through this that is fine but the details are not for me.

In the wake of this tragic event I will just remind the world that this is not over for all the families. Even though another week or so will pass and the news will start to wane. It will take months for some to be able to go out in public again and others may never. Family members will hold tight to a t-shirt or a teddy bear instead of their family member. Some will seek help and others will not. And for some years will pass in a blink of an eye and they will continue to live in these days. They hold on to the darkness and don't let in the light. They will be unable to move on. Unable to live their own lives. But they will not make the news. Their suffering will go unknown by most. This is where the terror lives. I think it is great that health care agencies are letting their patients know that they do have people that you can talk to on the phone and who may be able to help some deal with the tragedy.

So I have learned this morning that I today am more about the healing of the victims and their family members than the changing of the world.

In closing I pray. I pray for the victims those both with visible scars and those without. I know the wounds are real for both. I pray for the mothers and fathers, sisters and brothers. The friends and acquaintances of the victims. I even pray for those who may have thought of going out that night but decided they were too tired they to have survivors remorse. You will heal and it will take time. Be open and share your feelings. Take one day at a time and each decision that you make or don't make is ok. Everyone heals at a different rate and your healing will come. Amen.

Pete Rose for President

Usually I start and I am not sure what I am going to say today I know what I am going to say and I even had a title before I sat down. Now you are thinking why? There are two things that really annoy me with the world. People don't care who gets hurt for the sake of the sport and people have a very short memory for some things that should not be forgotten. Same goes for politics. People forget or don't care. Some might argue that was in the past. But most people don't truly change so if we were to forgive and forget how come people that have been convicted of a crime have to divulge  that information on most job application. But not when you want to play a professional sport or run for office. If you want to find out the bad thing someone did they leave that up to the other people running for office to run their slander campaign. Which most of us were probably taught if you don't have something nice to say don't say anything at all. Yet in the next few months me being a resident of Florida will be bombarded with ads on the television and the radio and even the news will take their political agenda on the road and on the air.

As the football season ends it makes me think of players that have been convicted of some major crimes but for the sake of the game they continue to play. I would not be able to sleep at night knowing that I employ a person who has killed animals for the sake of betting or let them be killed in his yard. I can not condone the behavior of athletes that beat their wives and girlfriends. The NFL has their month they dedicate to domestic abuse and that may make some feel better and be able to sleep at night but I wonder if the wife of the player using steroids to improve his playing realizes that that is also contributing to his abusive behavior.

So we are currently a 9 months away from the next Presidential election and we already have more than 20 people that have thrown their hat in the ring so to speak. And of course some have already dropped out. I cannot watch the debates with the likes of Donald Trump spewing out of his mouth the things that he does. It used to be that a debate had rules and protocol but then again so did the dinner table and most of those have been thrown out the window as well.

Here comes Spring Training and where I work I will have to leave early for the next few weeks so that people from places up north can come to Florida and watch the pro players get ready for the regular season. Now I am not a baseball fan but I will take a Spring Training game any day over a regular season game. There is that atmosphere of the smaller stadium and outside in the Florida sun with the cool breeze of what we call winter on your face.

Funny that tying sports and politics together does not seem to be much of a reach. There is a hierarchy among both sports teams and leagues as well as state and national governments. Since the rules are now getting thrown out during debates will we soon have no rules for baseball. Will it no longer be considered wrong to bet on the game you play or the team you play for. Really what difference does it make if you are buying your way into the White House or a baseball player just trying to make a better life for himself. Same difference.

So in 1989 when Pete Rose was getting thrown out of baseball, Ronald Reagan was still a President in the White House with all of his charm, wit and integrity. There was still a standard to be upheld. He himself had played sports. He was a man that people respected. I cannot name one person running for the office of President right now that I respect.

Now in the early 1990's Pete Rose paid for his crimes that he was convicted of and released. This is really when the problem begins for Pete. He tries to get back to life but the only life he ever knew was baseball and he is standing outside the fence watching the game and can't get back in ever. Now unfortunately he did probably know there were rules and he probably thought he wouldn't get caught but he did.  He now signs autographs for die hard Cincinnati fans but he knows how different his life would have been if he would not have ever bet on baseball. But what is done is done and he has truly been paying for his crime for 25 years. Was Pete Rose a great player? Yes. Did he beat records that will never be beat, probably. Did he break the rules? Yes. Has he paid for his crimes? I say yes. Do you think that letting him in now is still not going to be difficult. People will still ridicule him for decisions he made 25 years ago. But today in the political arena we don't hold politicians responsible for the things they said yesterday. Do politicians receive votes and money illegally? Yes. But they have lawyers and speech writers that will spin the truth into a pretty sweater with your initials on it and you still vote for them. So I say why not Pete Rose. He has admitted what he did was wrong. I don't think he is going to bet on China vs US and since we teach kids to forgive and forget isn't it time we acknowledge what he did well and leave the rest of the small print for people 100 years from now to read about online while they read about the first woman president who has already had her way in the White House or have people already forgotten that people thought she was running the country anyway?

Soup of the Day

Here I am at almost 5 o'clock in the morning thinking about soup? Some of you are shaking your head and thinking now I know she has lost it. That is funny losing it. Somethings your happy to lose like 20 lbs but  you may be furious when you lose your wallet. Either way you no longer have something you used to. There are people out there that would be thrilled to gain 20 lbs and some that would be thrilled to find their wallet. I am trying to learn to live with the things I find and accept that the things I have lost are gone.

When you toss a coin either way it lands someone wins and someone loses. It is never going to end on it's side and be a draw. Lately a lot of people believe we should toss again because the flip did not land their way. This is how I got to soup of the day.

Soups are of two basic kinds water base or cream based. You can add the same vegetables or meats and spices to both and you end up with two totally different things. Manhattan clam chowder or New England clam chowder. They are both made with clams but some will not eat one but love the other. Some people will not eat tomato soup with water added and some will not eat the tomato soup with cream added. I am of the school if I do not have cream to add I will add water. I just want tomato soup with my grilled cheese. Oh my we can not discuss grilled cheese. Because do I want brie, or mozzarella or American cheese. Do we want organic cheese or pasteurized cheese slices that I am not sure actually have any cheese in them at all but the label says they have milk. Hmm so why would you not eat tomato soup with milk or cream but you will eat the grilled cheese that is not even made with cheese but the label says it has milk in it?

So am I really pondering this morning about soup and grilled cheese. Well no. I am pondering love and hate. Which I have always said are really not that far apart. They are both based on passion. Because if you are not passionate about whatever the subject you will neither love it nor hate it. Now I am also of the school that I try very hard not to say that I hate anything. Even people. I mean I am no better or worse than anyone else so yes I do love and at times I do hate but I really try not to be so passionate towards the one end of the scale. Now I don't really care if you hate tomato soup and grilled cheese. Even if it is my favorite comfort food. Just more for me if you don't want to share in it. You can take it or leave it. Either way I am still going to take what I want and leave what I don't.

As you all know I do not watch the news anymore. Most of my news comes from social media which at times I can take it or leave it. Sometimes I have to leave it alone for a while as well. Mostly because of love and hate. Because people feel like the things that they love are right and the things others love are wrong.
How could that be? Isn't all love good. Well no. A very bad type of love just came to my mind that I will not share because well that is how I am. I may even think that I would hate people that choose that kind of love and am I right or wrong.? You don't know because you don't know what I am talking about.

See lately a lot of people have been showing their love and their hate for lets say chicken soup all over the internet. I am sick of chicken soup and tomorrow or today I am going to get broccoli cheese soup or french onion soup. The funny thing about soup is you can choose whatever kind you like but some restaurants are not going to serve both. Hmm. Why do they hate chicken noodle? What did the chicken noodle soup do to them. Well some will not eat it because it has chicken in it and they are vegetarians. Ok by me. Eat carrot soup. If you don't want to go to that restaurant because they do not serve carrot soup it is ok by me as well.

Same can be said for being American most of us love the freedom that comes with being an American. Some of our ancestors gave up everything for the hope of more. More freedom, more jobs, more money. Or maybe better working conditions and better housing conditions. But as they find out once they landed in our great land the streets are not paved with gold. And to have more freedom does not mean it is easier to always find a job with better working conditions or housing that is of a higher standard.

I have always thought it strange that at this time of the morning there is someone on tv somewhere asking you to give to a charity to help children in another country get the food and water they so desperately need. But rarely do you see someone asking you to help the children across the street that may not have food or clean water to drink. So why. Why do we spend money on teaching children in other parts of the world of democracy but here we teach the children how to take a test.

I could go on and on asking why. Why citizens of this country fight and die for freedom half way around the world but it is ok if you express your freedom in your yard but if your neighbor wants to express their freedom you throw a flag and say hey I do not share your passion for your freedom so I do not want it in your yard. How dare you eat chicken noodle soup in your house I am a vegetarian. Yet our sons and daughters go half way around the world so the people have the freedom to eat whatever soup is put in front of them and they are thrilled just to have the soup.

So my soup of the day is both political and religious and it represents people everywhere. Just let your neighbor eat their soup and Love thy neighbor. Someday you may need them to bring you soup and that day you will be thankful that they cared enough to bring whatever soup they had for you but you will also have the freedom to choose not to eat it.

Customer is always right?

My mind has been lots of places these last few days but last night at work and on the way home I thought about the saying "The customer is always right." I found on Wikipedia this morning that the phrase is over 100 years old. Said first by Marshal Field or Harry Gordon Selfridge who worked for Marshal Field department stores and later started his own department store in London. 

Now I find this tidbit of information to be ironic. These same two fellows were the first people to use the __Days left until Christmas countdown in advertising. This is AMAZING that the same guy who said to make the customer first also initiated the mad dash for December 25. If you do not find this to be a ironic you have probably never worked in Customer Service or Retail. 

People who don't work with customers that push paper or whatever it is that people do in dark cubicles at the end of the hall where only lost people stop and say hello may never have the opportunity to be face to face with their adversary, sorry I mean customer. I think that people that do not have contact with the person on the other end of their transaction are less likely to feel compassion for them or empathize with the customers situation can easily deny a mortgage or insurance claim. There is no face attached to the piece of paper no heart or soul shown. Same can be said when the customer receives back the claim that was denied or the foreclosure order. There is no heart or soul exposed. Maybe that is why we assume the person who made the decision is heartless or has no soul of their own. I know I can be easily side tracked but I am getting somewhere. I can understand that it could be easier to make a decision based solely on the facts if you do not have to look the person in the face or hear their disappointment over the phone. So this blog is for you. Those who think you are always right and know there are only 24 days left until Christmas.

Please keep in mind that as you stand on the side of the counter closest to the door or are on the end of the phone that it has somehow become acceptable for you to hang up abruptly on the person trying to assist you that the person on the enclosed side of the counter and on the end of the phone that they are told to be polite to the customer that person to has a heart and a soul. They have feelings and they do understand your situation. They have dealt with many of you before and will help many more after you are gone.

I know that on my end of the phone I do not know that your kids are sick and you do rely on your home phone service to leave them home alone while you go to work because you can not afford to take off work. I know you are frustrated that I told you that you will have to wait a day and a half for a technician because we are backed up because of the holiday last week. I will try to accommodate your availability but I do have restraints that the company mandates but they do give me the leeway to break the rules to help you. But sometimes even then. Even after all that I have tried and my years of experience I can not make something work that is broke all the time. Now, you have been fine but your wife in the background is furious and yelling. Not sure why but I try to understand her frustration.  As she takes the phone from you and starts yelling at me I am still trying to be understanding and sympathetic and accommodating. I am now being cussed at. Sworn at. Screamed at. Now for you the mortgage processor or insurance adjuster that does not ever have the benefit of this sort of transaction let me tell you to be on my end of the phone SUCKS.

I will now flip the coin for you. I came to work today because I would feel guilty to take time off from work even though yes, my mom did have a stroke over the holiday weekend and yes, she is in the hospital but she is doing so much better than on Saturday when I could not understand a word she said. My brother went to work today even though he had to call 911 after having trouble getting her to respond after taking a face plant on the back patio. My sisters all went to work as well after dealing with the stress of this situation on our holiday weekend as well. Ironically we all work in the public. My brother does not have as much contact as the rest of us but he is out in the world dealing with the people that get in the way of his lawnmower or blower. But my sisters and I put on the happy face and did our job. We all help people all day long in different jobs but we are on the side of the counter that we can not easily walk away from the situation. 

So let me get back to where I was going. I remember lots of customers by their situations. I do not remember names or any personal information. My head hits the delete button as soon as the information passes through my ears and past my eyes. I only mentioned once last night that my mom was in the hospital. Don't remember anything about the lady but she was sweet and she asked my moms first name. I told her Jeanne. She said, "I will say a prayer for your mom tonight". As the tears welled up in my eyes I finished that call and moved on to the next. That is my job.

But time after time last night I ran into people that were livid about their services not working. This is not unique to my line of work or in retail.  In retail establishments all across the country there were people that saw an ad in the paper for a flat screen TV for $98. Limited quantities. This to me says get there early or you may not get a TV. If I do not get the price I move on. If it was life or death I would have been standing in the store at 4AM when the sale started. But no TV is that important to me. No object is that important to me. I always keep in mind my roots on the back side of the counter and try not to be the customer that is letting loose on the cashier or the agent on the phone. I am not perfect and I have done it. It was probably 6 months ago and I could not deal with one more thing and a person called me and told me I that what I believed to be so as far as my service went was not the case. I did yell and I did cry and I did say I am sorry and I do not mean to be this customer and I need to hang up. The guy gave me his number and said to call him back. I have never called back. Not because I am embarrassed but because I still do not want to deal with the issue and it still makes me mad. 

Alright so where is all this mumbo jumbo going. There are 24 days left until Christmas. That is a fact. The objects which you wish to give your friends and family members do not replace love nor does the dollar amount of the gift prove their value.  So keep all of that in perspective and value the time that you spend with your friends and family these next few weeks. You do not know when one of the people that means the most may be gone. You do not know what the person on the other side of the counter or on the other end of the phone is going through. I am not expecting to undo a 100 years of misinformation in one Christmas Season. But I would like to see each of you stop and say Thanks to the person that helps you find that perfect object and cashier that rings you up. Maybe stop and drop some change in the Salvation Army's bucket instead of walking by complaining of the obnoxious bell. Be thankful for the work they do. The people they help are thankful for your donations even though they do not see your face and can not shake your hand and let you know personally. They know that whomever made the donation must be a generous, compassionate human being. 

So I will turn that upside down on you. When you call and ask for help or walk into a retail establishment imagine that you are the person in need and the agent on the phone or the cashier or store associate is the generous, compassionate human being that just want you to be well. And they are willing to give their last few cents or their knowledge to help you get what you need to make you happy and healthy and keep you safe. 

That is what the customer is always right means to me. 

Again the news.

So it has been a few weeks since I wrote anything. I am torn on subjects. So many things have been on my mind lately. I have been thinking about what we watch on TV and how it has changed. Everyone knows I no longer watch the news but that does not mean I do not know what is going on in the world. I get the worst. A quick blip on the news channel as I change channels. As soon as the word animal is mentioned in a news story Brian picks up the remote. I can not bear to know what someone did to hurt an animal and can not look at pictures. But I find nothing quite as disturbing as seeing people killed on TV. Used to be they would not show an animal tortured but no now somehow it is acceptable to show human beings. I credit my employer at the time I heard the story on Bay News 9 they would not show the pictures. Other networks could not make that same clear and obvious decision. This I can not understand.

I do appreciate that CBS cares and will at the end of a show dealing with a particular subject offer support through a website or 800 number. I am not sure why the news does not do the same. Some of the subjects that are on the news deserve more attention to what got the person there than the final act that actually got them on the news. 
Today it was a young girl who apparently committed suicide over being bullied. This I find to be terrible. I saw her picture on the news and on the website. I heard part of the Sheriff explaining the events that lead up to her death. If this much effort went into helping this girl deal with the bully would her parents be planning a funeral today. The money spent on looking for her once missing could have provided an army of support while she was still alive. And I know there was efforts made to help her. 

This young girl seemed to find peace with animals that others would find unapproachable. But she I imagine would sit and maybe cry at this abandon building. She probably did not have to find the animals but they found her. She probably told them her problems. I can understand. They listened and did not judge. They loved her for who she was. A soft touch they did not get from others.  I only wish those animals could have told her that the people badgering her were really worse off than she. And to with time all of this would pass.

But the bully to pick and pick and pick on someone. To blatantly focus all your negative energy on one person to the point they can no longer take it. How does that person feel now. Like they accomplished their goal. They need help and it is too late for punishing  the act of bullying. That will make some feel better but this to is probably a classmate of the same age. This child has a life time ahead. And if things are not turned around now. Where will they end up.Well of course. On the news themself. Mug shot and a description to their latest victim.

So I saw one story on the news today. One story. I saw one last week about the Syrian people. See why I can not watch the news. It truly bothers me. And my head just does not let go of this girls picture or that of the Syrian people being tortured to death. I will now go watch an episode of Mary Tyler Moore or Bewitched and forget what is going on in the world around me.

I am not sure that by watching these horrible events we call news on TV we are not becoming a 21 century of Gladiators and Vikings. Acts that in a few 100 years will seem intolerable and less than human and definitely not civilized. The bully of today could be the slaves master of the past. If you look at it that way it will take more than 100 years to correct what has become an epidemic among the young.

I will however say that if anyone is having these issues being bullied or tortured and need help ask for help. Make someone help you. Your live is more valuable than you know. You may be the next President or the person that is to find the cure for cancer. And if no one else will listen. I am here and would do anything for any other person When you are down it is hard to pull yourself up and sometimes just a hand is all you need or a good ear to listen.

After writing this blog I searched for a quote and found this one below and it tied in perfect. I did not know who the author was so I looked him up on line Dr. Love a motivational speaker popular in the 1980's. Ironically he studied the human disconnect and the meaning of life after a student's suicide.

“Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around.”

I just wonder how do I write about something. And use some of the same words to describe my feelings about what might have made this situation better and this man I have never heard of before said the same things 30 years ago. There is something out there in this world that directs me to write and helps me feel better. I hope that same source directs someone to read this that needs to as bad as I needed to write it and I hope they can find the help they need as well.

If you need help talking to your kids about Bullying. I have listed some websites below.

    http://www.pacer.org/bullying/

KidsAgainstBullying.org

TeensAgainstBullying.org

    http://melmonsta.com/

Walden

I purchased the book Walden maybe last summer and thought I should read it. I thought I hear people refer to it and thought it must be worthy it was published in 1854 and is still being reprinted today. Always makes for a good Jeopardy question.

So between calls for the last few weeks I have been reading and trying to absorb what he is saying about his life on the Pond. Two years, two months and two days. He lived near the pond about 2 miles outside of the town of Concord, Massachusetts in the mid 1800's.  To me this would be wilderness but to him he was just outside town.

I thought tonight I wanted to start with a quote and I love the website Brainy Quotes and found this one:

A truly good book teaches me better than to read it. I must soon lay it down, and commence living on its hint. What I began by reading, I must finish by acting.
Henry David Thoreau

Ironically the book is laying on the couch and I got up and decided I wanted to write a review even before I finish to encourage some of you, maybe just one of you to pick it up or borrow it and read it.

I read his description of the pond the other day and thought no normal person today or any day could have written this description. Most people I know could not sit and observe the pond long enough to learn this much. Which lead me to believe that a true writer has to have patience beyond belief. There is no other way for them to see what they see even if it is inside their head without viewing it from different angles or different perspectives or the same perspective on a different day. You could not walk up to the edge of the Grand Canyon and stand there in awe of it for 10 minutes and go yep it is deep and get out of it what a photographer that has spent weeks observing the light and shadows a then determine just the moment that he wants to capture forever. It is not to say that the casual viewer can not take a beautiful picture but they can not see the transformation through the day and decide just which view is the perfect one for them.

In his two years or so there he lived and observed the sights, sounds, smells. Describes views from the road or as someone walks through the wood to the the pond to go fishing or for a swim. How a hollowed out tree canoe could be left and shared by whomever shows up. Unbelievable. What would someone do today if their boat they never used was borrowed and safely returned. Crazy. But why. You aren't using it why not let the neighbor. Hmmm.

I also learned new words or old words I should say that are no longer used. Thank God for Google. I had to look up the word rod as in a term of measurement. The term was used to survey the land. A rod is 5 1/2 yards long. He uses it to describe distances throughout the book.

I find his words amazing. He describes the color of the water in the pond as a reflection of the trees, the sky or the sand on the bottom. And compares it to looking at a pile of broken glass and how it has a green tint to it but a single piece of glass is clear. How is that. The images are so clear. You don't have to imagine, his words paint the picture.

A man riding by in a wagon comparing his field of beans to the field a mile or so away. A train going by doesn't stop yet the conductor remembers the view of the pond that evening. A person leaving the pond after dark and can not find his way out. The night is clear but no moon. No light. Your feet must find their way because your eyes can not see it. These are not his exact words but the visions in my head from what I have read.

I will try to finish this weekend but it is not an easy read. I have to stop and re-read some sentences the words are not spelled the way we do today, or are not used as we would. But the images if he were a painter everyone would be able to see the beauty. Even those without the patience to read the words that paint the pictures.

I glanced to the Conclusion tonight to see what is coming and he directs his view inward as he says:

"Direct your eye right inward and you'll find
 A thousand regions in your mind
 Yet undiscovered. Travel them and be
 Expert in home-cosmography."

In other words there are places you have never been inside your mind or as I envision in your own yard. Check them out. They may be as beautiful as a place distant and will not cost you near as much to travel to and if in your head you can find these places of refuge on your own instead of spending a fortune to let drugs or a doctor lead you there. You are better off for finding your own way than being pointed in a way someone else has already been.

So I guess I am saying don't read the book because I did. Read so that you can say that you did and then you will know Walden pond the same way Henry David Thoreau knew it 150 years ago.

Makes me want to go.

Goodnight.

Comments

Whenever I read an article online I am always amazed and ashamed for the comments people will make about people they do not know. Subjects they are no more an expert on than I. Yet for some reason they feel that their opinion no matter how unthoughtful and unkind or just plain mean it may be.

When I was a kid I used to find it funny or silly that my father would watch the news and talk back to the TV as though Walter Cronkite could hear what he had to say. As I got older I found myself doing a similar act but instead to Dan Rather or Peter Jennings. None of them could ever hear our comments. Never hear my criticism of how the world is being run no matter how wrong something was.

Today it is different if you want to shout back at a reporter or the weatherman or anyone else and say your opinion you have the forum to do it and for some reason it is encouraged.

The encouragement is the part I do not understand. If you want to say your friends new hairdo on facebook is beautiful or your not sure what she was drinking when she did that. It is between the two of you and the friends that view the posts. But when it comes to a news story or even the weather. There are people out that for some reason read a story and immediately believe that they need to put their 2 cents in. Not in a polite way but in a unfiltered, unedited yet anonymous way.

If you are willing to put your opinion out why not put your name on it. Well this is where I believe that we have somehow grown to believe that by using an alias the words said are less harmful to speak. That racist, pig headed beliefs spewed on the Internet have no back lash other than in the online world. The person writing them may even think it is funny to get someone else fired up over something they just shouted out without thinking.

I have read things written about people I know that are not true and their is no taking it back once it is out there. Even the media rarely corrects the article that is wrong. There may be a correction but they do not actually correct the original article or even attach the correction to the original article. So it is like the TV commercial says. Well I saw it online and you know they can not put anything that is not true on the Internet. Oh here comes my French model boyfriend.

Are we really that stupid. Now I have noticed that recently that some news organizations no longer show the comments attached to the articles. I don't know why I ever looked. I guess I thought there might be some insight on the story or some new information but usually all I read is about how stupid the person is that is the victim and why were they in that situation and things of that nature.

Why would someone feel that this sort of comment is appropriate. How could it ever be. In the real world where I live if you want to say something you say it with your face showing. You should have enough intelligence to speak knowledgeably about a subject so that you do not look like a fool to those listening. But somehow somewhere it has become acceptable for people to make comments online that are not called for ever, even in your own home.

I understand speaking your mind. I have always been one to speak out when I felt something was wrong. I have gotten in trouble for things I have said and sometimes my mouth has been unfiltered but I never denied saying it. I did not blame Jane for something I did. (I made up Jane.)

So who are these people that are so smart and have so much to say but don't show their face or their name. I guess they are just big chickens that live in their mom's basement and their only communication with the outside world is the Internet. And instead of shouting that they need a friend or help they shout out absurd things about people they do not know.

I don't even know if making people put their name or face on an article like a reporter has to or quote a source would be enough but it might be a start for people to think before they post a comment online.